Saturday, October 18, 2008
Though we might be able to lead a productive life, even a "successful" life ~ if one defines success by the level of status, education, or material worth, it is unlikely we will actually ever be happy unless we are very aware of our specific feelings. In fact, it is quite possible to be successful. It is easy to accept without question other people's definition of success and happiness. But when we become more aware of our own true and unique feelings we are more likely to find our own individual happiness. This may be the essence of using our emotional intelligence.
Knowing the feeling is present
The first level of emotional awareness is knowing when feelings are present in ourselves. We become "aware" of the feeling when we first think about it or realize we feel something at that moment.
Acknowledging the feeling
Nature has given us a sophisticated guidance system in our feelings. Our negative feelings, for example, call our attention to things which are not healthy for us. The literature on emotional intelligence points out that our feelings direct us to what is important to think about. Through thought, our feelings can point us to the to the causes of our negative feelings and to possible solutions. But if we fail to acknowledge our negative feelings, we won't be able to focus our attention on the problem that needs to be solved. For nature's inner guidance system to function we must acknowledge our feelings.
Accepting the feeling
Sometimes we might think that we shouldn't feel the way we do. Such thoughts are the result of beliefs which have been programmed into us by others. One of the primary benefits of a highly developed emotional intelligence, though, may be that it helps us become more independent from the opinions and beliefs of others. Instead of listening to others' voices, we are able to put more value on our inner voice, a voice which speaks to us through our individual emotions.
The more aware of our feelings, the better chance we have of predicting how we will feel in the future. This can be thought of as forecasting our feelings.
We can improve this ability by considering how we will feel if we choose one course of action as opposed to another. The value of this ability can not be overstated. Only when we can predict our feelings can we make decisions which will lead to our long term happiness.
SO IS LOVE
IN THE HEAT OF THE SUMMER, THE COLD OF THE WINTER
THE WINDS OF THE SPRING, THE BRISKNESS OF THE FALL -
LOVE IS THERE, NEVER SURRENDERING AT ALL.
IN THE DARK, IN THE LIGHT, IN THE SHADOWS OF THE NIGHT
CURIOUSLY BEATING, FORCEFUL, OUTRIGHT,
SPONTANEOUS, PLANNED, ORGANIZED, CHOATIC -
SO IS LOVE.
SHELLS FROM THE DEPTHS OF THE SEA
REVIVED FROM THE BOTTOM
AND ARE SET FREE -
SO IS LOVE.
EACH GRAIN OF SAND SPAWNS THE HANDS OF TIME
CIRCLING THE EARTH, SEEMINGLY NO RHYME.....
OR REASON -
SO IS LOVE.
REMEMBER ME WELL, OR NOT AT ALL
I WON'T BE DISPROVEN
I AM BUT A CALL AWAY -
SO IS LOVE
(c) Copyright 2008 M.G.
Friday, October 17, 2008
The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges and changes. Who promised you that, sometime in the future, life will begin to begin ~ real life. There always seems to be some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Life embraces these obstacles, envelopes them, flows around them, under them and through them.
There is no way TO happiness. Happiness is the experience of living Life, fully in this moment and exploring all that this moment has to offer. So, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time, you, your Self .. and, remember that you (either consciously or unconsciously) attracted this moment to you for your highest evolution and growth.
Happiness is a journey ~ not a destination. Each journey starts with a single step .. and continues one step at a time.
How you handle this moment .. and the next .. and the next .. will determine whether you will experience happiness today, tomorrow .. or never.
You can experience happiness when you decide that, in this moment, there is no better time to be happy and that means unconditionally accepting your self in this moment, just the way you are. Only then can this moment give way to a brand new moment and a brand new experience .. of happiness.
Happiness is the journey, not a destination.
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"Happiness is a journey, not a destination" was published by Transpersonal Lifestreams, Hobart, Tasmania.
The url of this page is http://www.anunda.com/lifeskills/happiness.htm Updated: May, 2005
© Copyright 1998-2006 Christopher Wynter … revised 8th August, 2006
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Blowing dried grass
Carrying warm sand to new destinations
Releasing and spreading new life
Small holes in the wet sand
Bubbling beneath the tides
Minute sea life breathing
As the sea rises and falls
Filled with floating shells
Crustaceans swaying on seaweed and corrals
The song of the gulls
As waves hit the shore
Winds blowing the heat of the season
Through my flowing hair
Misty air, salty skin
Wet, sandy feet
(c) Copyright 2008 M.G.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Hidden behind the anger in a person "seeking mirroring" is the child who fears that the search will be in vain. Herein lies the risk for depression: the adult once again experiences the pain of not being understood ~ of not receiving empathy. The loneliness of the moment may be expressed as anger but the expectation of chronic disappointment will create the risk for enduring depression.
For those who have histories of being raised by caregivers who lacked empathy, the pursuit of empathy as an adult may be chronically in vain. Because of this, even slight failures in empathy from an important other, are powerfully reminiscent of childhood and convincing evidence that the possibility of an empathic friend, therapist, or spouse is nonexistent. Lack of empathy, when present in its extreme form, allows people to exploit others without remorse.
For those involved in ministering to others, empathy is a necessary skill. Men and women in ministry typically have strong empathic abilities. Nevertheless, there are pitfalls in practicing empathy. A common mistake occurs when a minister assumes he or she knows how another person is feeling because, "that's how I would feel" in a similar situation. "How I would feel" may or may not be the same as how another person feels. Non assumptions could lead to trying to rescue people who aren't in need and don't want help. We have all seen how this can lead to frustration and even burnout. Ultimately, accurate empathy depends on genuine curiosity about the other person and recognition of their feelings; this helps establish the groundwork for accurate communication.
Take the test ~
Would you say there's empathy and caring everywhere for everything and everyone all over the place; or would you say there's absolutely no empathy or caring for anything or anyone anywhere? And if it's somewhere 'in the middle' what do you personally think could be done to improve the situation in order to get more people to be empathetic/caring?
Empath Quiz Take the empath quiz
my results.. What Kind of Empath Are You? You scored as a Healer You are a Healer Empath. You take in the energy of others and transmute it. You trigger transformation in others and free trapped energy. You are capable of great healing abilities. You walk between the worlds and bring waves of healing energy with your presence. (from "The Book of Storms" by Jad Alexander at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Empaths/)
Healer 90% Universal 85% Judge 85% Shaman 85% Precog 70% Artist 70% Traveler 55%
Friday, October 10, 2008
What is heyoka? Heyoka has it's roots in Native American culture and is all about the power of doing things backwards to help us stay energetically in a good state of flow.
In addition being empathic and having a sensitive nervous system that is programmed
to pick up all sorts of nifty energy, many of us are energetically hard-wired "backwards." If you've ever felt different, like you don't quite belong, then you may identify with the magic of the Heyoka story. Many of us will zig while others zag. We may be happy at times when others are sad, and vice versa. We will be taking breath in when others are exhaling. We may even read books backwards; from front to back, or even read from right to left. For the most part, these inherent "backward" urges are programmed in our DNA.
In some Native American cultures, the heyoka is honored as a sacred clown who teaches the value of purposefully acting in a manner opposite to our natural instincts so that we don't get too serious. The heyoka is not comfortable with too much linearity, predictability, or social order. The heyoka has an intimate relationship with ambiguity and chaos as tools of spiritual advancement. If you have heyoka power, you may use this type of energy naturally. These heyoka moments help us to take ourselves less seriously.Even if you aren't Heyoka by nature, the Universe will give us days to experience the Heyoka energy.
For instance, I recently asked a friend to tune in to the energy that I was projecting toward her over the phone. When I asked her to concentrate on the subtleties of the jangled, anxious energy I was sending, she perceived it as completely calm and tranquil. When I projected feelings of being on a tropical island, it made her nervous and she felt her heart chakra close.
Why is it important to know about Heyoka? Because there are times when our normally reliable empathic perception and trusty intuition may be purposefully fooling us. On certain days, it may be best to do the exact opposite of what your empathic intuition tells you. With time and refinement, you will be able to discern when this might be happening for you. It's random and unpredictable; and because of this, it helps us pay closer attention and listen more carefully.
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This is done through pure prayer, patience, and finding others who are stronger on which to temporarily rely. We cannot accomplish our Collective task unless we help each other. Accumulated negativity (otherwise known as Karma) is never altered unless we have a stronger Light energy to absorb it and transmute it.
Prayer from a pure and humble heart is strong enough to erase and diminish any negative energy. It may take years to be enough to overcome, but with patience and perseverance, it will be overcome. Everything wants to grow and develop, including your limitations. There is nothing out there that can harm us unless we let it. The one sure thing that will stop anything from moving forward is by creating massive amounts of Light energy. After you set any healing intentions, there will likely be obstacles thrown your way ~ to test you.
Your job is to keep moving forward, despite the obstacles.
If you fall down 7 times, you get up 8 times.
You do not quit. You do not try.
There is nothing that is strong enough to break you, unless you let it.
Move forward by holding the vision of the good things that you want to create.
Excerpt from the book The Hanged Man:
I know I'm better because I feel worse.
The nice you are, the harder it gets.
The stronger I grow, the weaker I feel.
You can't give it to me because I already have it.
I can't be littler because you're not bigger.
The more lost I become, the clearer it gets.
I'm feeling confused, I must be in the right place.
I move furthest when I am stuck.
The more I cry, the harder I laugh.
The safest places are the most dangerous.
I can't make you love me, you already do.
I can't be special, everyone/no one is.
Given permission to rest, I work harder.
I may not get to win, but I don't have to lose.
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